Instinct - Chapter 5

5 - Questions

Iruka woke to a softly humming voice, his body curled up tightly within his very own blanket.
For a moment he lay there, blinking, refraining from moving at all. He was warm, comfortable, enjoying the peaceful quiet he so rarely encountered. Yet his chest was heaving with every breath he took, and the longer Iruka was conscious, the clearer grew his memories of what had happened… well, how long had it been? A day ago? Maybe two? For a moment the chuunin even doubted his own vitality. Had he died, after all, and was now being cared for in heaven?

A sudden pain along the right side of his neck drew the man's attention back into the present. Carefully, he had craned his head to take sight of whatever situation currently encompassed him, and was now interrupted by the sharp pull of freshly sewn stitches. Iruka heaved a sigh as his fingers slowly traced along his accurately bandaged jugular. The events of the past night still seemed a little blurry to him, but one thing was for sure: There had been something attacking him- or rather someone. Someone he knew and couldn't believe was involved in all of this.

However confusing the circumstances, the chuunin's considerations were interrupted all of a sudden. Iruka's breath caught as a low hiss emanated from a silhouette that had just entered the room a few feet ahead of him.
One single grey eye met two hazel-colored ones with a cautious stare as Hatake Kakashi started to pace along Iruka's bedside slowly, his lean frame shuddering ever so slightly. His arms were crossed in what seemed like painful restraint while the mask, now covering the lower half of the man's face again, quivered every now and then like the man was just experiencing utterly stressful minutes. Iruka gaped at the jounin with silent astonishment.

So it really had been him.

Fireworks of colorful pictures flew past his inner eye, leaving traces of what might have happened in all the incidents nobody had been able to explain just yet. Bare fangs ripped through Mizuki's throat, tore at his neck until it snapped. One rapidly spinning red eye flashed through thickly grown bushes, observing a chuunin that was grieving for his former best friend. Innocent words and appealing gestures formed a mixture of attraction and betrayal, and Iruka's eyes snapped widely open as he finally found the piece that had yet been missing.
The puzzle was solved.
There had never been a monster, never been an animal nor a formidable unknown opponent.
It could have been so obvious; it could have been so easy- if the ferocious beast had been any other than the infamous Hatake Kakashi.

It took Iruka a moment to regain his calm; being gazed at like he were tonight's dinner made him feel both endangered and thrilled at the same time. His thoughts kept circling around what his mind still had not really processed, while his heart was hammering against his ribcage like it was going to pop out at every moment.

"So it was you," Iruka finally managed to choke out, his face a grim façade of all the horror he had been struck by just seconds ago. "Of all people who could have committed such crimes, it was you. You, who kept playing the innocent and was roaming around my house like a stray cat, you, who was trying to give me the feeling of being appreciated for what I am. All you wanted was my trust. Isn't that true?"

The chuunin's throat was burning with both anger and pain; anger towards his own stupidity for not doubting the man's intentions any more seriously before; pain rising from the torn flesh that no other but the man in front of him had brought about. A low cough emanated from Iruka's throat, but the heavily metallic taste didn't even make him flinch. Brown eyes bore into the visible grey one; and Iruka could see the other man struggle for his self-control.

The chuunin pushed himself up onto his arms with an effort. He was not ready to let the other go without receiving so much as an answer as to why his friend had had to die.

"Blood. You drink it", he continued. "Why? How can you be the monster that has been haunting Konoha for so long without being detected sooner or later? You're Sharingan no Kakashi, you can fool one or the other fellow shinobi, but how have you been able to betray your Hokage? Have all your actions been a mere act of distraction to make people miss your real self? It's logic, isn't it? Now that I think about it, why has nobody ever wondered how you were on missions every single time the beast attacked? How come nobody has ever seen your face? You couldn't show it, is that it? You had to hide yourself so nobody would find out what you really are?"
Iruka had talked himself into a rage.

His chest was heaving under the weight of the blankets that were still wrapped neatly around his lower body and his legs, and the appearance of blood that kept mingling with his saliva seemed to increase in frequency. Yet, the chuunin couldn't have cared less.
He was so close to the solution of all the mysteries that had made his life a mess ever since Hatake Kakashi had encountered him on the balcony that night; he was not going to give up just now.

However, there was something that was bothering Iruka even further; something that made his anger flourish and his calm vanish into thin air.
"How can you even STAND there and watch me with that cold eye of yours, not saying a word!? You killed my best friend! How dare you still stay at my home!" the chuunin spat out as another coughing fit started shaking his frame.

Iruka was panting for air, carefully biting back on the sound of pain that was rising within his throat. He was breathing deeply to overcome the sudden weariness as a cold hand was pressed flatly against his chest and pushed him back against his pillow in a surprisingly gentle manner. One attempt to object was all Iruka managed to bring up before a second hand covered his lips with twitching fingers and made him fall silent.

"That's enough, Sensei," a quiet murmur reasoned while the blanket was drawn back over the now shivering frame with expert movements. Iruka's lips parted for another raging fit, but once again, the fingers were way faster. "Please, rest now. You lost a lot of blood and I  would regret losing you now that I managed to let you live."
For the blink of an eye, Iruka considered objecting once again, but found himself within the tight embrace of warm blankets before he was even done thinking. His lips twitched with discontent but kept still as chilly fingers slid into his shirt's collar and moved with utter caution to readjust the bandages he had just strained a little too much. A low hiss slipped through Iruka's teeth to ward off any further contact; and the fingers retreated.

That last statement made it seem like the attacker had decided not to kill him against his own expectations, but Iruka didn't feel like hearing him out just now. His throat was burning like fire while the blood loss was still wearing him out. One last intent look into his eyes, then Kakashi slowly backed out of the room and into the corridor.

Iruka listened to his softening steps as the man strode away. It was only when he heard a door lock that he finally relaxed. He wanted answers to all the questions he had asked, explanations for all the incidents of the past weeks, but for now, he couldn't ward off his weariness any more.

Just as Iruka's eyelids started growing heavy, he gave into his exhaustion and fell asleep once more.


The next morning dawned with freezing winds and hammering thunderbolts that had Iruka bolt upright from his sleep. A quickly placed hand pressed the chuunin back into his pillow just as the pain in his throat started throbbing fiercely through the bandages.

Iruka bit back an outcry of his distress. His sight was still dizzy thanks to the sudden pain, but his hearing was quite fine, and he could listen to the raging storms outside his window as the hand on his chest slowly retreated. No sound of breathing reached his ears, and the chuunin's eyebrow crinkled in a lack of understanding as to why his visitor would breathe evenly enough for him not to hear his exhalation anymore.

Slowly, Iruka turned his head to the right side where he suspected the guest to be, and indeed, there he was, awkwardly combing his silvery hair with his own fingers.

For a split second, the chuunin considered starting his rant all over again, but as the grey tuft of hair rose and revealed warily lifted eyebrows and, to Iruka's surprise, two eyes, his train of thought was effectively stopped.

"Good morning", came a low greeting, and Iruka's breath caught once more.
His eyes had, once they had adjusted to the dim light, locked on the other man's lips, that now parted to speak and revealed the likely reason Hatake Kakashi had always been covering his face in dark cloth.

Teeth. Sharp, long and pointy. The shiny white of the jounin's canine teeth blended perfectly with his pale skin color, and Iruka shook his head in disbelief. "You really are a predator, obviously," the chuunin slowly choked out, which earned himself a soft chuckle from the other man.

"Doesn't the pain in your neck attest to that?" he countered, and Iruka flinched.

True, his memories had not yet faded, and the subtle pull along his jugular was more than enough proof for what had happened. Kakashi had indeed attacked him only a few days ago- how much time had passed since then was still unknown to Iruka, and the fact that the aforementioned jounin was still standing in front of him lacking his infamous face mask made Iruka lick his lips in irritation.

He felt weary and weak, but way better than the last time he had been conscious, and his memory had fully returned to what it used to be. His anger had not yet faded, however, and the chuunin kept struggling not to let his rage break loose once again.

Anyhow, now that Iruka was returning to all of his senses, he started to think things over. Switching his point of view to a neutral one, the chuunin had to admit that certain pieces didn't seem to fit into the whole impression he had gotten of the copy nin.

Why, by all means, should the jounin have let him live and, in fact, saved him, if he really was the ferocious beast of prey he suspected him to be? It was a matter of fact that Kakashi had attacked him, and it seemed logical to accept that it had been him, as well, who had killed Mizuki only days ago.

Still, it was obvious that the man had decided not to kill him, and why should he have saved an ordinary chuunin's life, if he was as reckless as it appeared?

Things didn't seem to make any sense, now that Iruka started thinking them through, and Kakashi's calm features right next to him didn't help the matter at all. On the contrary, the jounin's attitude did nothing but confuse Iruka even more, while his head kept spinning and spinning.

Questions piled up in his brain while nobody did anything to help him solve the puzzle.
Kakashi, in the meantime, had taken a seat on the carpet right next to Iruka's bedside, and was now watching the play of features on the chuunin's face. His left eye remained closed, as always, while his right eye was observing every single mien visible on the other's features. Every now and then, his gaze locked on the delicate skin that stretched and relaxed with Iruka's every move and a low grumble escaped the pale throat.

When the threatening sound reached Iruka's ears, the man looked up with fierce curiosity.
His tongue flicked over dry lips while he was searching for the right words. "Kakashi…" he finally began, eyes locked on the still visible crown of his tooth. "What are you? Why am I still alive? And were you the one who killed Mizuki and all the other people whose corpses were found out in the forest?"

One grey eye arched up in a smile, while pale lips twitched upwards. The canine teeth grew more visible the further Kakashi's upper lip lifted, and Iruka could feel a shiver run down his spine. He remembered the deep growl that had erupted from the jounin's throat right before he had sunk his teeth within the tanned flesh quite well.

"You want answers, I assume," came a soft murmur from Kakashi's lips, and he winked at the other man.
Iruka slowly nodded, pushing up against the frame of his bed to lean back into the pillow. "It's about time you explain a few things to me," he confirmed.

Kakashi's smile grew wider. "Well then, where should I begin?"